


How to save a life

by wevegotworktodo



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-15
Updated: 2016-06-15
Packaged: 2018-07-15 04:17:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,438
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7207514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wevegotworktodo/pseuds/wevegotworktodo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is for @thing-you-do-with-that-thing’s day off challenge. I was given the song How to save a life by the Fray. This is my first challenge and when I listened to the song this is what immediately popped into my head. I used a ton of the song’s lyrics and I hope I did a good job of conveying my vision</p>
            </blockquote>





	How to save a life

****************************

 

The radio is blaring and gravel is flying as you pull out of the gas station lot. When your back tires make contact with the pavement they squeal and the rear of the car kicks sideways. You press your foot to the floor and correct, bringing it back into your lane. 

You reach into the passenger seat and rummage through the grocery bag of snacks, pulling out a soda and cracking the top. You're in desperate need of a caffeine boost and even though it's still morning, it's just way too fucking hot for coffee, so you settle. 

You start to fiddle with the radio trying to find a station with less static, you turn the dial and in the brief moment of silence you're able to hear your phone ring. You pick it up and answer hesitantly. “Hey Sam, What's up?”

“It's Dean.” 

Your heart all but stops. “How bad is it?”

“He's alive, but it's bad enough for me to call you, ask you to come back.” You're both relieved and concerned at the same time. Sam's voice is shaky so his brother has to be in some real trouble. 

“Elaborate.”

“The mark, it's...it's affecting him.”

You slam on the brakes, and make a u turn in the middle of the road. “I'm headed your way, a few hours out, want me to meet you at the bunker so you can give me the details?” 

“No, it might be too late. Put me on speaker, we'll talk while you drive.’

 

************

 

Honestly you'd do anything for the man but seeing him again after all this time, you're not sure if you're ready. When you walk in several heads turn, but you don't see the face you're looking for. It's not crowded, maybe only 15 people in the entire joint so it only takes you a second to find Dean. You know that back -the prominent muscles that aren't even hidden under a layer of cotton and flannel. You know his legs - the way they bow, the slight curve so subtle when he's straddling a stool like this, but you've noticed it a million times. He’s leaning on the bar, shoulders slumped like it's the only thing holding him. He brings his glass up, raises his head, swallows, and drops it again. 

Sam told you where to find him. Dean’s been spending all his free time here lately and he's worried. ‘Dean needs you. You're the only one he’ll open up to. Please take a few days off, come talk to him,’ he says, ‘lay it all out, don't leave any room for misinterpretation or hidden feelings, and I pray to god he hears you.’

A vamp, a werewolf, shifter, demon, these you can handle, you know how to save someone from a threat like that. You don't know how to save someone from himself, and for the first time you begin to wonder why you came. 

You can't do this. You turn to leave, to run away again, and then you think about what Sam said, so you stay, but you need more time. 

You grab a seat at a small table near the back, and order a double on the rocks. You're in desperate need of something to both chill you out and give you courage, so you ignore the burn and all but chug it. Round two, you lean back in your chair and stare while you just watch, study him from afar. 

As your eyes stay glued to Dean your mind drifts, imagining how this will play out. 

_Step one: you say ‘we need to talk’. And you do, you start to force the words out because they don't come easily. But he's nervous, you're nervous too, and maybe he starts to pace a little, because Dean hates these kind of talks, hates sharing feelings, hates being put in on the spot like this. ‘Dean, sit down it's just a talk.’ ___

You take a deep breath and reach for your drink, dragging your fingers through the water droplets that have accumulated on your glass. You bring it to your lips and over the rim you see Dean raise his finger. He's motioning to the bartender for another round, this time he leaves the bottle. Fuck! It may be worse than you thought, but then again this is Dean, and he's always been a barrel of blame and self loathing. 

You have to get through this, just say the words, go through the motions, try to stay detached. 

_He smiles politely back at you, you stare politely right on through. He goes left, tries to change the subject to anything but this. You stay right between the lines of fear and blame, redirect him back to the real issue. ___

You take another swig and the ice clinks against the side of the glass, reminds you of the last time Dean toasted you after a successful hunt. How his eyes lit up and he threw his head back as he laughed at your bad jokes. And that memory leads to another -why you left in the first place. 

Unreciprocated love. Two years of trying to find the courage to tell Dean you love him, waiting for him to tell you, but the day never came and so you decided to leave, you figured better to have an empty heart than a broken one. You managed to lose a friend somewhere along in the bitterness, today you came to make amends, to be the friend to Dean that he always was to you. 

_You'll tell him that you know best, cause after all you do know best. Use your best puppy dog eyes to try to slip past his defense. You'll lay down a list of what is wrong, the same ‘ol things you've told him all along. The same exact reasons that get him into trouble, this kind of trouble, so often. The reasons why he carries the weight of the world, and you pray to god he hears you. ___

You sit up in your chair, put both elbows up on the table,and finish off round two in another large gulp. Dean shifts on the stool, hooks the heel of one boot on the bottom rung, lets the other leg dangle. He straightens his back and runs both hands up over his face and through his hair. You think for a moment that maybe he's gained his composure, had some sort of epiphany, and there's no need for you to be here after all. You're wrong, he slouches again and pours himself another drink. 

_He'll begin to raise his voice, ‘You're wrong Y/N!.’ You'll lower yours, hoping to calm him down, and then you grant him one last choice. ‘Let's drive until we lose the road.’ Maybe he'll take you up on the offer, run away together forever, forget everything but each other. ___

You order round three, watch the waitress as she places your order at the bar, and you see her look at Dean. She's smiling and flips her hair to the side as she sits beside him, waiting for your whiskey. He smiles at her, leans over and whispers something in her ear. Your heart skips, your breath falters, no you can't watch this happen again. 

You see her facial expression change, and you laugh, a little too loudly, thankful for the jukebox which is helping to hide your current enthusiasm. She storms away from Dean, delivering your order in a huff. You smile and take a sip. 

_He will do one of two things, he will admit to everything, tell you how right you are, or he'll say he's just not the same, and it will all of been for nothing. ___

Deep breath. You can't put it off any longer. It's time, so you stand, adjust your clothes, pick up your glass and you move towards Dean. You see him pick up the bottle, no longer bothering for a glass, and he takes a long draw. You lay your hand on his shoulder, “Dean,” your voice is shaking but you mange to get it out. 

He turns, looks up at you, and maybe there's a small flicker of light in his eyes. Without saying a word he wraps both arms around your waist and pulls you in so tightly that you almost fall into his arms, although now he's the one slumping into yours, his head buried in your chest as he begins to sob. You stroke his hair as you cry with him, thinking how things could've been different if only you'd known earlier how to save a life.


End file.
